7/26/23 Feeling All the Writing Feels

I have completed my first round of edits for Sonder and Reverie and it's a strange feeling. I hope to have it self published soon, and that's both scary and crazy!

On the flip side, I'm honestly terrified of starting and pursuing a new project, and I'm not sure if I'm on the edge of burnout or I just feel so busy to the point of not being able to truly focus.

Sonder and Reverie has been my passion project for the past six years, starting my freshman year of high school and it's insane to think that the story and those characters of mine are wrapping up. It's possible I could write some spin off novellas for the characters I feel are open ended, but I'm also feeling at war with the fantasy genre and probably need a break from it.

I don't feel satisfied with any content I'm consuming lately, whether it's books or television. I need something to get excited about, like stories that are engaging and worth filtering my time into. I'm currently reading three books simultaneously and it's both rewarding and frustrating. Not getting the same kind of passion in literature and entertainment may also be part of the writer's strike that's currently taken over Hollywood. I'm concerned about entering the writing work force with the amount that people are paid being less than the quality of living they need to survive.

I want to write and publish stories, and I don't really mind how I do it, either through self publishing or working for a smaller publishing house. All I care about is bringing authentic story to this world where artists will always be relevant, no matter what AI advancements are made to try to snuff us out.

To write and share my thoughts is ultimately what I wish to do, and it's difficult when something like writer's block or just feeling inadequate is holding me back.

There isn't anything to say for not feeling doubt when it comes to careers in general. I'm still not sure where my path is going to take me, but I'm going to take advantage of opportunity whenever I can.

College burnout is real, but I'm hopeful my classes this semester will ignite the exhilaration of writing and literature for me again. The one thing I do want to improve is this feeling of unsatisfaction. By watching more shows and movies and figuring out what about character and plot I empathize with and admire in a story, to use for my own personal work. I will explore more books beyond my preferred genre to understand how the structures of those types of stories work as well.

Not feeling satisfied is a big part of creative content making, and even though I feel so busy and like I don't have enough time, carving that space out for myself is the only way to improve. To keep writing and experience more of life so that I can feel inspired to continue fueling my passion.

Never stop being curious and ambitious in anything you do. Ask insightful questions and meet interesting people. Persue, gain information through experience or exposure and don't stop falling in love with what you do for a living and what feeds your soul.